Hexes for Your Exes

We don’t condone using dark powers to hurt anyone here at Divorcist, but in the spirit of this fun and spooky season, we came up with a few hexes. Get your candles and cauldron and join the fun!

Hippity dippity

Wigglety wine

Sorry skippidy

Those band t-shirts are mine!


Thunder and lighting

Strong and wild

May your young new partner

Be mistaken for your child


Tail of newt

Eye of frog


I’m taking the dog!


Women laughing

Besties cheering

Guess who has

A divorce hearing?


On your house

I put a pox

Now you can wash

Your own damn socks


Babys breath

Clipped fingernail

Give me my money b*tch

Or I’ll put in you jail


Kitty ear and doggy tail

Gaslight me again

And your next date will fail


Blazing stove and burning cinder

May we never meet again on Tinder


I call on the treats

I summon the tricks

At no point in time did I ask for dick pics