Divorcist

The Gift Registry Built for Domestic Violence Victims

The Divorcist Registry isn’t just for victims of domestic abuse, but it has been built for victims of domestic abuse. 

Let me explain. 

In 2015, I was working at a nonprofit in Wisconsin. I got into this amazing fellowship program that taught women how to advance bills through the state legislature. We were put in groups and given a bill that had gotten stuck somewhere between being drafted and signed into law. It was our job to get it unstuck. 

My group was given the Safe At Home Bill. This would establish an address confidentiality program for the state. If a victim of domestic abuse or stalking moved house, this program gave them a dummy address so that their real address is never used in public. 

For victims, this is hugely significant. Tragically, the risk of violence and death increases after a victim has decided to leave their abuser. As my colleague in the fellowship told me, “abusers are savvy, savvy, savvy.”

Think about it like this. 

A woman flees her abuser and moves into a shelter, then on to an apartment. The abuser has been trying to locate her. He calls Walgreens and tells them “I’m trying to get a prescription delivered for my wife but it hasn’t arrived. Could you tell me which address you have on file for her?” If you’re enrolled in Safe At Home, Walgreens only has your fake address and your abuser is none the wiser. This program, which was signed into law in 2016, saves lives. 

So in 2021 when my friend Elizabeth and I set out to make a gift registry for breakups, I knew that our customers would need a level of privacy that just isn’t offered on a standard wedding or baby registry. Our motto became “design for the most vulnerable user”. 

This was my challenge: how do we adapt the Safe At Home Act to software? We can’t give all of our customers fake addresses and forward their packages but we can keep their shipping addresses private. 

Thanks to the creativity of our (all female!) engineering team, when you create a Divorcist Registry no one who buys you a gift or contributes to your cash fund ever sees your address. 

For extra security, you can set your registry to be public, private, or password protected. Because even if you’re not fleeing an abuser, no one wants their ex snooping around their new apartment wish list.

Our gift registry is private and secure, but it’s also gorgeous. We wanted to make a luxurious retail experience because people going through divorce and breakups deserve nothing less. Our products range from everyday necessities to big ticket pieces of furniture and happy little self care items. Our cash fund is completely free to use and we don’t take any fees from the transaction. 

The mission of Divorcist is to make divorce and breakups dignified. Whether you have survived the unthinkable or have just had a rough time, we want to make it easy for your community to have your back. 

Don’t be shy about asking for what you deserve out of life. Start your Divorcist Registry today.

 

If you are experiencing domestic abuse or intimate partner violence, please reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline on 800-799-7233. Find out if your state has an Address Confidentiality Program

 

Eliza Cussen is the co-founder of Divorcist.