Crowdfunding for divorce is becoming more and more popular. The cost of divorce can be a major barrier, and free or affordable legal help can be hard to find. Divorcist is here to tell you that it’s okay to ask for help – in fact, it’s actually what your friends and family want you to do. This post explains why crowdfunding your divorce makes sense and how to do it sensitively and successfully.
The price of divorce
As a rule, the more contentious a divorce the more expensive it can be. But even if everyone agrees on what’s best, fees can run into the thousands. On average, divorce costs $24,000 per couple in the United States.
This does not take into account the increase to cost of living associated with living in two households that used to be one.
These expenses need to be more or less doubled:
- Rent or mortgage
- Healthcare
- Utilities
- Home and auto insurance
- Food
- Furniture and household items
- Housing repairs
Particularly if you have kids, divorce isn’t something that ends when the ink is dry. Being divorced is a massive shift that continues through your life. It’s okay to recognize this, tally up the costs, and ask for help when you need it.
Ask for help during your separation
On the most popular crowdfunding platform, a gift is made once every second. People ask for help with everything from medical bills to creating short films to getting a beloved pet taxidermized. And yes, more and more people are using crowdfunding to help with their divorce.
“My divorce came out of nowhere,” said Ashley, 30. “I was pregnant when my husband started cheating, and 5 days postpartum when he told me he didn’t love me and didn’t want to try any more. I went straight into survival mode.”
“Thankfully, I had amazing friends who came in and swooped me up. One of them (a new mom herself), fed my newborn so I could finally get some sleep. In the haze, I was told that a cash fund had been set up and friends had donated $1,000 in just a day. It paid my grocery and utility bills for my first month as a single parent. But more than that, it reassured me that I would not be alone.”
How the Divorcist Cash Fund works
Our cash fund is completely free to use and, unlike other crowdfunding tools, we don’t take a portion of donations.
We understand that the newly-single (or about-to-be-single) need things to be private and secure. When you create your cash fund and registry, you can choose to make it private, secret, or password-protected. Even when your registry is public no one but you ever sees your shipping address. We got you, boo.
To get started:
- Create a Divorcist gift registry
- Set your privacy settings (you can always change them later)
- Set your cash fund goal
- Add a couple of items you need or want
- Go to settings and connect a Paypal account
- Share with your loved ones
- Donations go to your Paypal account automatically. From there, you can withdraw to a bank account, or keep funds in Paypal for safekeeping.
Tips to make your divorce cash fund successful
In the registry description field, explain a little about your circumstances and what kind of help you need. You don’t need to lay it all out there, but it is good to be specific.
For example:
Jason’s Divorce Registry: As some of you know, Anna and I have recently split. This wasn’t on my plan for the year, and it’s been hard in ways I didn’t expect. I’m in the middle of setting up a new home for me and the kids, as well as finalizing our legal separation.
If you can help at all, here are some of the expenses we’re hoping to get help with:
Therapy for me and the kids so we can all adjust to the big changes
Baseball and soccer fees so that the kids can continue their after school activities
Increased childcare fees as Anna will no longer be able to pick up the kids from school
We’re all stunned by the support we’ve received so far. If you’ve sent me a text or made me a lasagne, I am beyond grateful. Thanks everyone!
Key takeaways for crowdfunding your divorce
If you’re going through a hard time your friends and family want to help – they just need to be told where to start.
It’s okay to want things. After being in a difficult marriage, it can be hard to identify what you as an individual need and want. Part of healing after a breakup is reconnecting with that part of yourself and becoming comfortable with that kind of vulnerability. We’re here to tell you that it’s okay. Would a yoga membership help? Crowdfund it. Think a week away just you and the kids would help you all reset? Crowdfund it. Want a really nice set of towels? Register for it.
Divorcist is about people living life on their own terms. That doesn’t happen overnight, it’s a process that you’ll undertake for the rest of your life. Give your friends and family ways to be on that journey with you.
