Boyfriends are fine, but best friends are finer.
Remember when you were little and it was the cool thing to have a best friend? And then it became the cooler thing to have a boyfriend? Time and time again, friends have taken the backseat to work and family obligations or your latest fling, but during this time in life I think you’ll find that we have come full circle. Welcome to the era of best-friendship.
Why Friends are the Most Important
We’ve all heard the classic, “my boyfriend is my best friend!” exclaimed from a love-struck honeymoon-phase girlfriend a time or two. And, great! A significant other should be someone you’d be friends with even outside the relationship. But your lover shouldn’t be your only friend, especially not your absolute best friend. You can’t rant to your boyfriend about how much your boyfriend got on your nerves this morning, which is where your bff comes in. With an outside perspective on all your relationship drama, they are everything your lover is not.
Best friends are superior all around. Your partner might be a great friend to you, but if (and when) the relationship is over, then what? Your close friends will be the ones who are still there to step in and pick up the pieces.
Importance of Good Friends
Friends are important, but why are best friends so important? It’s right in the name–they’re the best. They’re the ones who can read your mind from across the room with just one look. Or correctly guess “pennant” in pictionary when all you’ve drawn is a triangle. Or bring you a cute stuffed prairie dog from the store that they HAD to get because they know it’s been your favorite animal since forever.
Who is Your Best Friend?
No, it’s not your dog. Don’t get me wrong, pets are great friends. But when it comes to a best friend, you’ll probably want someone who can answer you in words rather than barks and tail wags. Your best friend might be the girl who grew up down the street from you, or maybe she was the only other girl in your class who liked Capture the Flag as much as you. Maybe her locker was next to yours in high school, or maybe she sat in the cubicle next to you at your first job. Whatever the circumstances, the only thing that matters is that something in you clicked with something in her, and you’ve been soul-mates ever since.
All-Around Health and Well-Being
Not only do best friends offer a shoulder to cry on, close friendships have been proven to improve your health and well-being.
Friends Improve Your Physical Health
Social isolation is linked to a variety of health issues like substance abuse, high blood pressure, and even cancer, so it makes sense that having strong social ties contributes to good physical health. Having a circle of friends or a best friend can decrease your risk of health complications like diabetes, heart attack, and stroke. According to a meta-analytic review, strong social relationships decrease the likelihood of premature death from any cause by half.
Best Friends Offer Emotional Support
Meaningful friendships enhance your life in many ways, like teaching you about yourself and challenging you to be your best self. You won’t go through anything alone when you have a best friend. Best friends know when something is wrong (even if you don’t admit it) and are ready to open their arms and their homes to you in times of need. A best friend is also not afraid to call you out when necessary, though. You’re thinking of sending a risky drunk-text to your ex? They’re there to hide your phone from you and remind you why you deserve better. The kind of support system that keeps you grounded and sane in the most insane circumstances.
Are friends better than lovers?
Spoiler alert: they are (but we already knew that).
Do you ever look at your besties and realize that loving people is actually the easiest thing in the world? Can’t say that about every stray boy you pick up off the streets. Significant others and lovers come and go, but best-friendship is for life. They’re the ones who will be there to lift you up and help you through rough waters (like getting you through your latest break up). A best friend is always prepared to show up with Starbucks and lend a listening ear for your troubles, and even more ready to indulge in a little trash talk about your ex with you. There’s really no better way to show unconditional love than that.
Spend less time worrying about finding a new man, and more time appreciating the goddesses of women you’ve chosen to make up your circle. At Divorcist, we understand splitting from a significant other is painful. But you know what helps? Friends. Friends > lovers, all day every day.
We are passionate about being there to support you as a fill-in friend when you need it most. Make sure to keep up with our blogs, and sign up for our newsletter so you never miss an update.